Zentangled Paradox


Paradox

I am gonna share with you a poem I wrote over 10 years ago. When I was just trying to figure it all out. I thought this drawing went well with it because it to is confusing yet beautiful.

There is something in my head, but I can’t figure it out,

Am I losing control, I want to stand and shout,

Or is that really what my heart desires,

Or am I simply fueled by the fires,

Of anger and frustration that is held within,

I can’t believe that I’ve been stretched this thin,

My body is telling me that I had better stop,

Before my juice runs out and over uncontrolled I flop.

Am I really this tired or is it all in my mind,

I feel something’s missing, something I can’t find,

A lot of things go wrong and yet, so much is right,

Is what I’m really feeling deep inside fright?

All of these feelings just can’t be let loose,

Am I a loser, a freak, or at the end, the caboose.

What is it? What wants to take control?

I wish I could walk through my mind on patrol.

Does this make sense or have I lost you?

The confusion overwhelms me, I just might turn blue

in the face from holding it all inside.

Is there someone in my life in whom I can confide?

I know there is someone, but would they really care?

Do I let them know my secret, Do I really dare?

Not that the secret is bad, but that its really this,

I have so much in my head, so much that they all miss.

My mind is cluttered it needs to be organized.

Maybe when I feel this way, they’ve got me hypnotized.

Can they really handle every feeling that I have?

Sad? Happy? Frustration? All together drive me mad!

What am I doing spilling all my guts,

No one can heal me from all these deep cuts.

So many in my heart, and yet you’ll not see any scars.

Its as if I put the these emotions on a rocket ship to mars.

This way no one knows them, and they can all be free,

And no one will have to feel these things, but me.

Charity Woods, 2003

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